A story shared on China’s largest Q&A forum Zhihu attracted discussion from many people.
A mother said, at dinner, her 8-year-old son pointed to the calluses on his father’s hand and asked, “Why is it that Dad works so hard but our family is still poor?”. The father bowed his head and said nothing.
In another family, the boy may have been scolded, but the mother did not. She answered me: “Do you know who spends the most money in your family?”. The boy shook his head. The mother continued: “See, toys, books, snacks I all buy for you. Not everyone’s job makes a lot of money, but I worked very hard for you to have a living. But that’s not the most important thing, because the love and companionship of parents make the child happy and peaceful.”
Having said that, the mother further explained, the family only spends what is necessary to ensure the essential needs of the children. “My parents tried their best to make money, so you don’t have to compare with other families. I believe that just by working hard, we will soon have a better life and move into a big house like our dreams. ” said the mother.
In life, many children have had similar questions.
The famous Chinese writer and host, Fu Thu Er once said: “Do not lie to your children to appear rich, but also do not complain about poverty. It is necessary for children to actively acknowledge and understand the members of the group. family, that’s the best way to educate.”
So with not-so-well-off families, how can children not feel guilty and progress?
1. Make it clear to children that parents are working very hard
Children need to know that the most valuable thing in life is not how talented they are right now, but they need to work hard every day to make life better.
For families with limited resources, they should not repeat the chorus “our family is poor” day after day. Need to show children that making money is not easy and let them feel the hard work of making money. When they appreciate their labor, children learn how to use money rationally, not demanding or wasting money.
If parents often complain about poverty, it can cause long-term psychological trauma for children. Children feel like being poor is a defect, “poverty is a sin”. Therefore, the gentle complaint of parents becomes serious for children when they have to listen to it too much.
2. Telling children who are poor now doesn’t mean poor in the future
It should be affirmed to children, the current family may not be rich, but the future will definitely be better. Family conditions in the past and present can be compared, if there is no real story, other families can be told.
The story to illustrate the above point does not really matter, as long as the message is conveyed to the child. Parents always remember: “Poverty is not scary, the scariest thing is always thinking that you are always poor”.
3. Positively praise and set a good example for children
Parents are always the biggest and most important teachers of children. Therefore, in order for children to be positive, parents must set an example for their children, for them to look at and learn. At the same time, parents must pay attention to praise and recognition to maximize their children’s fighting spirit.
In fact, whether rich or poor, any family needs to teach their children to have the right view of money. There is a saying that is always true that “If we don’t do it, someone else will do it for us”. If parents don’t teach their children about money, they will learn from others or learn on their own. Then you may study in the wrong direction and this is a loss for you. When children have the right attitude about money and know how to manage money properly, other things will become easy.
Vy Trang (Follow screctchina.com)