According to marriage and family experts, not being transparent about finances between husband and wife is also a form of infidelity, threatening the durability of marriage.
Financial dishonesty is when you or your partner hide your financial information and money transactions from your partner, for example concealed expenses, have “black funds”…
A study by the National Endowment for Financial Education, USA, shows that 2 out of 5 adults admit to being financially unfaithful. The study also found that financial dishonesty is the reason for 30% of divorces in the US.
According to financial expert Joie Bose, India, when getting married, it is necessary to share financial responsibilities. If you still spend on personal interests without regard to your partner, that is a lack of respect. This does not mean that you are not allowed to spend or do things you enjoy with your own money after marriage. Hiding these expenditures from partners and ignoring the consequences of ill-considered spending is the problem.
Some people will ask: So are things you buy but don’t tell your partner considered financially unfaithful? Do you need to ask your partner’s permission when buying small things? So marriage makes you lose your freedom to spend?
Not necessarily so. For everyday expenses, you don’t need to share them with your partner, but if the expenses are large, which can affect the family budget, you should share with your partner. Those large amounts include:
Borrow big loans without your partner knowing
Family finances should be done together because one person’s decisions can easily affect the other. Therefore, if you take out a large loan without telling your partner, it is financially unfaithful. Talk to your partner about your debt and listen to their advice. Don’t forget if you take out a large loan and the inability to repay will affect the whole family.
The secret to buying great assets
It is not okay if you buy properties or invest large amounts of money in high value things, while not telling your partner about it.
In the event that you absolutely must, ask the question: Are you doing it because you don’t trust your partner or are you on guard out of insecurity? The answer will help you a lot.
Spend money on luxury items
Sure, you can spend money on yourself, but if you splurge on luxuries while your family’s finances are in trouble or you buy luxury items for someone without telling your partner, you’re clearly being unfaithful. Financial.
If you really want to buy a valuable item, you should talk to your partner to consider the spending budget together, before making a decision.
Gambling takes a huge toll on family finances. In the event that you gamble and put your family finances at high risk, that is financial infidelity.
What causes financial infidelity?
Lack of trust: This stems from a lack of understanding between two people, leading to an inability to make financial plans together.
Different goals: When spouses do not have the same financial goals, it is very easy to develop financial infidelity. For example, one party wants to splurge on clothes, travel, parties, and meals while the other wants to save every penny for a secure future.
Addiction (gambling, shopping…) or adultery
How to detect a partner is financially unfaithful?
Not transparent about income
If the partner does not tell you how much he earns, does not know how he/she spends money every month, it is clear that they are lacking transparency about their income with you. As a couple, you should have a frank discussion with your partner about it and ask for transparency.
There are credit cards, bank accounts you don’t know
In case you find out that a bank or credit card is in your partner’s name without your knowledge before, or you discover that they own private properties, this shows that the other party has no public intention. tell you. Or you find items that the other half buys but always says “bought it a long time ago”… , you can’t access his account to check the transaction information, it shows The author has something to hide.
Loss of family budget
In the event that you discover a loss in your joint account, it’s wise to ask questions, rather than ignore signs of a lack of clarity in spending.
How to deal with financial dishonesty?
According to expert Joie Bose from Bonology, the first thing you have to do is accept what happened. This is a three-step process. The first step is to calmly consider the current situation. Step two, you sit down with the other half to have a frank discussion and understand the problem. Step three, jointly have a specific financial plan for the family’s future, instead of blaming and blaming each other.
The important thing you need to find out is why is the partner not being transparent with you financially, because of a lack of trust, because of personal issues or something?
The key word for the three steps, according to experts, is communication. The problem should be approached with support and understanding. When both listen to each other, any problems can be overcome.
Thuy Linh (According to Bonology)