Every parent loves their child, but due to personality traits, many parents tend to raise children wrongly.
Here are three types of parents who have a hard time building a strong bond with their children.
Childhood traumatized parents
Children who are hurt by their parents from a young age often form the thought: In the future, I will never hurt them like that. However, when they are parents, they are at high risk of falling back into that “trash”.
A study conducted by the University of California, published in 2018 found that parents who experienced severe trauma or stress in childhood are more likely to have children with mental health problems. behavioral health. These types of childhood difficulties include parental divorce, emotional, physical or sexual abuse, witnessing domestic violence, parental mental illness, etc.
Dr. Adam Schickedanz, the study’s lead author, found that children of parents who experienced negative childhood experiences were twice as likely to develop attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and at higher risk. Children are 4 times more likely to have mental health problems than normal children. Because of that, the relationship between parents and children is never good. For example, if parents are patriarchal and impatient with their children, later on, adult children are also likely to become impatient and selfish people when dealing with their parents.
Many parents have such high self-esteem that there is a constant need for ego satisfaction. For their children, they ask them to grow up to their expectations and fulfill the things they set out to do. Instead of letting children develop normally with full strengths and weaknesses, they force them to be perfect in all areas, so that they can open their eyes to everyone without caring about the child’s ability and feelings. young. If the child does not comply, the parents vent their anger on the child, even nagging, doing things that cause great harm to the child, for example, killing, comparing…
The results of a study conducted by Alex Jensen, professor at Brigham Young University (BYU) show that children who are frequently compared by their parents tend to do worse in school than their siblings. . Children form a psychological fear, want to hide from their parents, instead of accepting their demands.
Many parents have the habit of controlling their child’s life, stemming from psychological insecurity about the child. Parents manipulate their children in many ways, some use violence, some use attitudes… to force the child to do things his way.
Dr. Becky Spelman, a British psychologist, says that the typical sign of a manipulative parent is that they try to neutralize their child’s emotions, coercing their feelings with typical statements like “If you if you don’t do it right, I don’t love you anymore” or punish with silence… This process, over time, trains and makes the child passive, not having the courage to make any of his choices. alone, in the end forever trapped in the orbit of their parents, unable to get out.
This type of parent-child relationship is also not equal, because children form an attitude of dependence, abandonment and unconditional compliance with their parents, while in their hearts there is always a negative feeling about others. control” yourself.
Thuy Linh (According to QQ)