Mistakes in parenting make children selfish

In order for children not to be selfish and dependent, parents need to avoid the following toxic parenting methods.

Always say “Yes” to your child

Research linking genes to selfish behavior in children, published in Science Daily in 2013, shows that children who are pampered by their parents as adults will only care about themselves. Children show little empathy, misbehave with others, and lack work ethic.

To teach children about compassion and tolerance, parents must learn to say “no”: Don’t clean up for them, don’t agree to buy things they like, and they can’t talk that way.

In addition, parents need to point out the consequences for inappropriate actions, helping children see the situation from many different angles.

Young children need to be taught by their parents about compassion and thinking for others. Illustration: Independent

Do not look for opportunities to teach children

Many parents think that children are young, not interested in everything around, but the truth is the opposite. Children have very good observation skills, they easily follow and recognize the expressions of adults to adjust their behavior.

According to experts, parents need to create many situations to help their children put themselves in the shoes of others to empathize and share. For example, if you want brothers to help and care for each other, while making cakes with their children, parents can let their children choose their favorite fillings and think about their brother’s preferences.

Not teaching children about empathy, compassion

When children are eight years old, they can understand a person’s emotions not only based on what is going on, but also the influence of the outside environment. That is why, in addition to information and news on television, social networks or earphones, parents should talk to their children every day, so that they understand the essence of the problem, and distinguish right and wrong.

Taking advantage of the time when children are psychologically perfecting to help them know how to care, support and stand up for others instead of being indifferent to everything, is what parents should do.

Responds to all requests but does not teach gratitude

Working for what is received or being part of a family is an important way to help children realize the importance of helping others.

In addition to teaching children how to express gratitude when receiving help, parents should often ask questions and hypothetical situations around kindness, to form habits in children.

Teach children about gratitude, how to say thank you when receiving help.  Artwork: Independent

Parents should teach children about gratitude, how to say thank you when receiving help. Illustration: Independent

Don’t let me do volunteer work

Volunteering helps different lives have the opportunity to connect. Kindness in a community easily brings people together and tries to understand each other’s experiences. This makes it easy for children to open their hearts, be ready to help those around them, and not care about receiving in return.

Minh Phuong (According to CNBC)


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